New Era (part three)

It's hard to describe a "new era" in one simple post, so this is part three of my story. Please bear with me, if you are so inclined and hear more about the changes in my life. Let start by saying that while change is tough, especially changes that are not wanted, or expected, they have all created a better situation for me. Of course the change in our country's leadership is still up for debate as to whether it is good or not... but that's a topic for another time!

If you didn't read the last few posts, let me do a quick review:

• I have become single again, and started dating again.
• I got fired from my job of 15+ years, but I got a new job working at a company that I enjoy.
• We have a new president of our country

A few things haven't changed, but are significant to the rest of the story:

• I still have my wonderful car, a red 2006 Chevy HHR.
• I still have the duplex that I bought in May of 2007.
• I still have the marital home that my ex-wife returned to me.
• I still have my health.
• I still have four wonderful kids, and
• a semi-decent outlook on life.

This past September I moved into the marital home. The place isn't the best place in the world, and feel free to read any of the stream about the marital home if you want to catch up. The place is still in serious need of repairs, especially on the inside, from all of the water damage from when the roof was leaking, and from the lack of maintenance on the place in the last 10+ years. The good news is that because of this move, that the other half of the duplex became available for rent, and I was able to find a tennet.

My oldest daughter, "One", was having a rough time keeping up with her bills, and needed a cheaper place for her and her boyfriend, "PlusOne," to live. She asked if I would "cut her a deal", because she couldn't afford the full rent I was asking for. I agreed because, well, she's my baby, and I couldn't say no. She moved in around Thanksgiving, and during the move the strain of the money and the move soured her relationship with "PlusOne" and they seperated. They have since recovered, and I believe they are still planning a wedding sometime this year. My daughter has me wrapped around her little finger, and since she was struggling (worse than me) with money and her relationship with "PlusOne" at the time, I let her slide on her first month's rent (December). In January she also slide a little bit on the rent by giving me an xBox 360, that was worth less than the month's rent. The xBox is wonderful, and I love it, but it didn't help to pay the mortgages or the utilities, so my money has been tight this month. This month, February, I should have my first month of full rent from both sides of the duplex, which should give me just enough money to pay all of the mortgages and utilities for the place! - Yeah, no profit, just break even.

The hope was that I would have enough money from the rental and my job to pay all of my monthly expenses, but no matter what I do, I am just not able to do it. My expenses are over $1,000 more than I make a month, and to make matters worse, this has been going on for so long that my savings is drained, I have used up all my credit, and during my change of jobs, I emptied my 401k retirement plan and use it to pay bills. I am now actually worse of financially than I have been in many, many years.

I spent the last 6 months of last year trying to figure a way out of the financial crisis I am having. I went to credit counsolers, attorneys, friends, family, random people on the street, basically anyone that I thought I could get advice from. There was no real good answers, only one answer seemed to provide any shred hope. So, this past month I have did the one thing I never, ever wanted to do ever, and is probably the biggest change in my life (outside of divorce). I filed for Chapter 7 Bankruptcy!

In the bankruptcy claim, I am trying to keep the marital home so I can have a place to live, and the duplex so I can keep a source of income, and my car so I can to and from work. Even though I am trying to keep all of those assets, it will still be tough, and I may not be able to keep them all. As a matter of fact, one of the mortgage companies on the marital home is now trying to foreclose on the house, in spite of my attempts to get all of the past payments caught up, and reaffirm the mortgages in the bankruptcy. (BTW: There are two mortgages on the marital home, together both total only around $22,000, so we aren't talking a fortune here.)

This last and biggest change is still "in progress", and I am not sure of the final outcome, but I only hope that like the other big and unwanted changes in my life, it too will end up being for the better.

Maybe now that we have a new president, I could petition the government for a bailout, like the banks, and the auto industry have done. I mean, I am very similar to them, in that I made poor choices and have been a victim of circumstances beyond my control. Unlike them though, I wouldn't need the billions, just about 50 grand would do. What do you think? Should I apply?

The new era has other smaller changes, but I have spent enough time and words on this topic. I will end with a joke: If want to donate to the "Lou Laughlin New Era Foundation", contact me for the details. The foundation accepts PayPal, personal checks, cashiers checks, money orders and of course cash! :-)

Later Lou

A new era (continued...)

Yesterday I mentioned that 2009 is a new era. I talked about the new leadership we have in the government, and to be honest, what I heard on the news this morning makes me want to write about it, but I will refrain - for now.

I thought today I would share a little bit of the new era in my life personally. The last post I made about my life was on September 10th, of last year. Interestingly on "Sweetie's" last birthday. Just a reminder, Sweetie, isn't my sweetie any longer... but I will admit my heart still yearns for her.

Sweetie decided last May that she didn't want to be a couple with me any longer. I moped around a little, and then tried to convince her to come back. Needless to say, I wasn't successful. Being a middle aged (when did that happen?) man, and being, as my kids say, "a geek", I don't really hang out in places where I am likely to meet someone new. So, I have signed up to places like Match.com and eHarmony.com.

I met some very wonderful women, and had some dates, many only first dates. Maybe my standards were too high, but I had hoped that I would find someone that would get me so excited about her that I would forget about Sweetie. Here it is the end of January, 8 months later, and I am still thinking about her every day. That part of me hasn't let go yet.

I have digressed completely from my topic... I want to talk about the NEW things, not dwell on the past, but I guess you have to talk a little about the past to understand the future right?

In my last post in September, I mentioned I didn't want to talk about work because I was afraid I would get fired. Those words must have been prophetic, because 8 days after I posted it, I got fired. Yeah, fired... not laid off, not downsized, not cutback... outright FIRED! Why? Well, as with all stories there are two sides. But i will only regale you with my side.

The morning of the 18th of September, I got called into my boss's office and asked to shut the door. When I sat down in the chair opposite his desk, his first words were: "What's your problem?" Not being prompted ahead of time, nor with more information than that, I had no idea what he was talking about, and stated that a few times. After he realized that I truly didn't know what he was talking about he, told me what HIS PROBLEM was. He wanted to know why I hadn't turned in my time sheet for over 4 weeks.

The truth was that I didn't think the time sheets were really important. He didn't make them important either, because he didn't say anything to me for over four weeks. I guess, I thought if he truly needed them, he would have asked for them, or at least sent out a reminder.

Anyways, I didn't think I should say that, so instead I said, "I don't have a good reason, I just didn't do them, I am sorry, I will do them now." That answer was apparently not good enough, he said he needed a reason. I explained that I didn't have any really good excuse other than I made a mistake and I will correct it. He got red faced, and started yelling at me about what a terrible employee I was and how that I must be intentionally not doing these important time sheets, and since I was doing it intentionally, that I am being disrespectful and insubordinate, etc...

I reminded him that I was all current on all my projects and he knew that without the time sheets, and that there were other employees who are turning in their time sheets but were behind on their work. I tried to return the focus to what should have been most important: the project. I was wrong, apparently the time sheets were what was the most important.

The scene got worse with him yelling at me, and putting me down, and I wanted to leave the room, but he wouldn't let me. He continued to yell, and I tried to defend myself, but to be honest, I didn't have a good defense, since I was wrong and I should have done the time sheets. Even though my work was still being done, was all current, the quality of my work was still high, and my last review in February was a 4.5 out of 5, were all irrelevant facts. I finally couldn't take the yelling any more, so I left the room, and he chased me down the hall into the main lobby and continued yelling. Told me if I didn't stop he would fire me right then and there.

I stopped, and I let loose. I started yelling back. I told him that I thought he was a terrible boss, and was out of touch of his employees. I told him that he spends too much time worrying about the small unimportant paperwork and red tape and not enough about the people working for him. (I even used the movie reference of the "TPR reports" from "Office Space", which I knew he liked.) I told him that he has held our product back and was personally responsible for the downward trend of sales because he failed to allow the product to be improved because he felt it was "too risky". All of that went in one ear and out the other. The point that finally got and got a reaction was the line when I told him that he spent too much time with one particular girl in the testing department, and that because he was too focused on her "butt" that he was out of touch with the product and his employees. BTW: Everyone in the office knows he's having an affair with her, but no one will speak about it. At that point, he pointed to the door, and told me to "Get out."

Well I was upset, so I did "get out", and I went to my cube, grabbed my jacket and I left. As I drove home, and cooling off, I started to think that I didn't really know what "Get out" meant. Was it a get out now because we are both too angry to talk, or was it get out and don't come back. So, when I got home, I called the HR department and asked them to tell me what I should do. They didn't call me back until the next day, and they proceeded to tell me that "your employment with the company has been severed." I was absolutely flabbergasted. I couldn't believe that my boss could pick a fight with me over these stupid time sheets, and I could be fired, when he's the one having a office relationship with an subordinate. When I asked why, I was told because I yelled and cursed at my boss, which is unacceptable behavior. Of course, the boss can yell and curse at me, but I can't do it back.

All of my friends in the company that heard the yelling match between us told me that I was right in everything I said, and that I didn't deserve to be fired. But, that doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

They told me that I couldn't go back to the same office, and there were no openings for me in other offices, so they were dismissing me. To their credit, they paid me me for my unused vacation time, and the last bonus check they had apparently been holding on to. That gave me a month's worth of income to tide me over until I found a new job.

I am now working as a software contractor (temp job) for a different company in the same area where I was working for before. I have been doing everything I can to get hired on as a permanent employee here. My manager has told me a few times he likes me, and the work I do, and he is doing everything he can to keep me.

I really like the company I am working for now. The environment is positive, the people seem to like their job, and the manager is great. Looking back, I am glad I am no longer working at the old company, and I am much happier now, even though I am making less money. Hopefully the less money thing is a temporary thing!

I described this as a new era, and the new job, and the loss of my sweetie isn't the only significant parts of the change. There is more, but that's for another time, so stay tuned!

Later Lou

2009 - A New Era

First off let me say to those who are reading... "Happy New Year - 2009!!!" I know, I am a little late at saying that, since the first month of the year is practically over, but as they say "better late, than never!"

For me, 2009 is more than a new year, it's a new era.

The country has a new president. He is the first person elected to that office with a skin color darker than all of those before him; not that his skin color has any impact on his qualifications for the job, or whether or not he is a good man. I hope that he is qualified, and a good man, but I even after the longest campaign in history, I am not sure I can claim to know his qualifications or character. I am, however, delighted that the country is able to elect a person based on their words, ideas, and character instead of looking solely at the exterior (age, gender, and skin color).

My hope is that our new President does in fact improve our country and create an atmosphere of togetherness without creating any more of a burden on the population such as new taxes, regulations, or more government. My hope is that he reduces the government involvement in our lives, which will in turn allow the individuals in our population to rise to the challenges our country faces without hindrances, and foster an culture where anyone can and will achieve greatness. Great people are found in more places than just our government!

My concern is that we may have in fact elected our new president based on his exterior or an "image", or the exterior of the man running against him (age). Our new president's first week in office have been filled with executive orders (rules and regulations), proposals and promises of more government spending/involvement. His speeches are grand and wonderful, but do not seem to coincide with his actions. He speaks of all the things I hope for, but he implements all of the things I am concerned about.

Barack Obama is my President, and like all citizens of this country, I have the right to voice my opinion and even disagree with the direction and plans our president is implementing. I haven't used that right to speak about our president that frequently. I also will admit that I agreed more often with our previous president, although I didn't always, especially in the last two years. I am hopeful that ideas and situations will arise in the future that I will agree with our new president, but unfortunately those times are not now.

Before I do express my opinions I want to say I will not use "name calling," or "put downs" to express my disagreement. I feel that any person that works towards and succeeds to the office of President of the United States of America, deserves the highest respect, unlike the untold number of people who did not respect our previous president. I am ashamed of those people, and ashamed that friends, family and fellow countrymen could be that petty. I think that anyone that "name calls" a person, especially one who achieved the presidency of our country, just illustrates their own shortcomings. My initial concern on election night was that this same "pettiness" may have tainted the objectiveness of the voters. I truly hope that concern is unwarranted.

I call this a new "era" because for me "change" is also personal to me, but not because of the new president. This new era starts with lots of changes in my life: a new job, a new home, and practically a whole new life. My concern is whether or not this life is better than the one in the previous year (or era), but my hope is as with the new president, that the troubling signs at the start of this new era will only be for the short term, and not of the long term future.